Monday, February 14, 2011

02-14-2011 aka Kiki's V-Day Commercial

Kiki ruins another holiday. Oh, Kiki. :-P



Haaay! Y'all know what today is?! Dat's right! Time to hide under yo bed so those creepy little naked angel babies don't shoot yo' ass! Who thought this was a good day to celebrate?! Chidlins with weapons is a serious issue! Anyhoo... it's also Valentimes... Balentines........ it's V-Day, y'all! The day that you spend all you money trying impress that certain honey you got yo eye on and tap dat ass! Well, I'm here to help you get laid AND save you some money, with Kiki the Lesbian Pirate's Bootleg DVDs! You can get all the romantic... and even freaky.... DVDs your little heart desires.
Like:
Gone with the Weave - Once the wig was off, it was on!
Room with a Jew - It may be a cheap dump, but it's got running water! That's romantic, right?! Oy vey!
BrokeBlack Mountain - A desperate bruthuh will do anything for money... and love!
You've Got FaceBook Pokes - For quick and easy ways to say "hello"!
Runaway Bitch - Next time you'll know to tie dat ho up!
Love Actually... Sucks - Fugg the love, gimmie the push and shove.
Shaniqua Jones's Diary - Dear Diary, Finally found a good man. He got a job and hits me only every other day.
When a Man Feeds a Woman - He expects that bitch to put out!
100 First Dates - Why stop at 50? Especially when a girl forgets you the next day and you convince her with "No baby, you said you liked it in the backdoor"
A Wok to Remember - Stir fry this big gurl up some good lovin' and noodles, PF Changs!
Casa del Blanca - When an Hispanic man falls for an uppity white bitch, you know something freak gonna happen there!
When RoShawn Met Paula - Well, they never actually met yet, but once she returns his calls, game on bitch!
Sleepless in The Ghetto - He did a drive by on my heart. No... really... love in the hood is a dangerous thing.
and There's Something About LaQueefa - He's captivated by her smell and high pitched sounds of love.

So come on down to Kiki's DVD Emporium, located in the parking lot of the Stop 'n Go! If I don't have it, I'll get it in a minute! 100% guarantee, and as always 100% $1 each!
A'ight, I gots tuh go return this damn camera to the pawn shop before they realize that I stole it and come lookin' fo' me. Remember:

Roses are Red
Poppies are, too
But if I see red with blue
I'm-a act like I don't know you!

Bye!



Kiki's V-Day Outtakes

Friday, February 4, 2011

Totally Loving You + Audio

Once again, I know that I don't have the best voice, but I could always Ke$ha it, right?  ^_-

Click here for the audio: http://chirb.it/cAKn5r

Totally Loving You 05-23-2004
(Previously unfinished – finished 03-10-2009)

Stop me if you’ve heard this tale
Of a love over e-mail
What started small became so huge
But I’m sure this is old news

Y’see, this broken boy was taken
And his tired heart was aching
For someone new

He options for a night of fun
Maybe just hang out with someone
He jumps online to find a friend
And finds his search comes to a quick end

Now the lights don’t seem so dim
Since he found someone like him
Out of the blue

At first it isn’t what we meant
It was all just a crazy accident

I am totally - Loving you loving me
Broken hearts heard fate call
That made us meet and made me fall

Then the tale takes a turn
The staleness makes us twist and burn
We fight that fire with our flame
But in the end we're both to blame

We let that love slip away
Now this is the price we pay
For our mistakes

We struggle hard day and night
Anything to start a fight
Through it all we're both still there
The love's still strong, we both still care

Set aside our separate view
We are willing to do
Whatever it takes

At first I thought that it was fate
But now I know that you're my soul mate.

I am totally - Loving you loving me
I'll be your strength when weakness crawls
You'll be my light when darkness falls

(instrumental)

I am totally - Loving you loving me
Broken hearts heard fate call
That made us meet and made me fall

I am totally - Loving you loving me
I'll be your strength when weakness crawls
You'll be my light when darkness falls

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Sci-Fi Expo 01-2011

I apologize for the crap 'slap together' editing.  :-P