Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Thursday, August 12, 2010
To tomato or not tomato?
I go downstairs to the deli/cafe type area in my office building. I go to the build-your-own salad bar. I put lettuce, cucumbers, mushrooms, and black olives on the plate. I hear a woman muttering. I turn to see a lady sitting and eating by herself, head turned to look in my general area, finger outstretched and pointing at a chunk of tomato on the floor by her feet. "You dropped something", she repeats. I look at my plate of no-tomato salad and then her plate of what looks like nothing BUT tomatoes. I ignore her and go pay for my salad thinking, "Uh, no I didn't, you lazy crazy!" People really need to take their meds. >_<
EDIT - Ruby Jean! It was fuggin' Ruby Jean from True Blood! That loony bitch!
EDIT - Ruby Jean! It was fuggin' Ruby Jean from True Blood! That loony bitch!
'Cause I'm not large with the butch
So, last night, home alone and bored. I decide to go play with my makeup (for special effects, not pretty pretty princess) and try to come up with something cool for Halloween. After playing around with the makeup and washing it off, I say out loud to myself , "Okay, now I need to do something manly to make up for that. Beer. I'll have a beer. That's manly. Scotch! That's pretty manly, too! I'll have a beer and some scotch." Then I saw a Hershey's Bliss bar, "Oooooooo!!! Chocolate! Yay!" Masculine fail. >_< Yeah... the butch never works with me. Not that purses fall out of my mouth every time I speak or anything flamboyant as that! :-P I try to spit, I end up with a dribble... belches come out silent... and when I scratch myself, I crush a nut. >_< So, I'm somewhere in the middle of butch and queeny. This is why I consider myself more geek than gay. There just isn't a category for me... but I kinda like it that way! ^_^
Oh, if you can guess (NOT Google) where the title of this post came from, you get bonus geek points from me! ^_^
Oh, if you can guess (NOT Google) where the title of this post came from, you get bonus geek points from me! ^_^
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Monday, July 19, 2010
Quickies with Brad! 07-19-2010
More quick movie reviews from flicks over the weekend! ^_^
She's Out of My League - Very cute, charming, and funny movie. Jay Baruchel and Alice Eve have great chemistry together, but it's the scenes with T. J. Miller and Krysten Ritter that really won me over. The only issue that I may have had was the high number of main cast members. I really don't want to remember everyone's name and role during a silly comedy. Despite that fact, it was a fun ride. Rent.
Vampires Suck - Everyone that was involved in the making of this "movie" should have to give refunds to everyone that spent money on it and then after they go broke, become homeless, and resort to eating cat food, they should die in agony alone in a ditch... possibly on fire. The only time that I laughed (which was twice by the way and yes I was counting) was only when comedian Ken Jeong was on screen. Although the jokes he delivered were horrid, the way that he pulled them off was all his own hilarious style. You'd be better off just watching his stand up acts. Pass like a kidney stone.
Carnival of Souls (1998) - Although very loosely based off the original 1962 film of the same name, this version still manages to hold up its own as a very superb piece of horror. Despite it being twelve years old and having barely any gore, I still found myself cringing and jumping. Wes Craven rarely lets me down. Rent.
Alien from L.A. (via MST3K) - Wow. I cannot believe that anyone could seriously watch this with a straight face. Kathy Ireland sounded like a wounded kitten that needed to be put down, the makeup jobs looked like something a half retarded gorilla from the 80's would do, and the acting was bland and incomprehensible. The only, and I mean ONLY way that you should watch this is with my good friends from Mystery Science Theater 3000. They could make a steaming turd funny. Actually, they just did with this movie. Rent.
Teenage Strangler (via MST3K) - Now, I've seen a lot of bad, and I mean BAAAAAAAD movies (see Vampires Suck) but there are some that just don't have ANY sort of redeeming value at all! Even when Mystery Science Theater 3000 sinks their vicious teeth in this and rip it apart, it still isn't worth the time that you could spend crocheting or learning Dutch. Pass.
Coming soon: The Sorcerer's Apprentice
Also, I'm gonna change the name of this segment to "Quickies for Commoners: Movie reviews for the non movie snob". Still gonna keep the quick few lines format with a mixture of comedy and seriousness, and since no one owns the rights to the "Buy, Rent, or Pass" rating system, I will hang on to that until I think of something better.
Until then, thanks for reading! ^_^
Edit: What do you think of this rating system: "Own, Watch, I'd Rather..."?
The first two are rather self explanatory:
Own - I suggest owning the movie.
Watch - You're good just watching it the one time.
The last one will be unique to me:
I'd Rather... - Something that I'd rather do than watch this movie. Will be different every time. "I'd rather watch a good movie." "I'd rather get a poke in the eye." "I'd rather lose my eyebrows in a grease fire." etc.
What do you think?! ^_^
She's Out of My League - Very cute, charming, and funny movie. Jay Baruchel and Alice Eve have great chemistry together, but it's the scenes with T. J. Miller and Krysten Ritter that really won me over. The only issue that I may have had was the high number of main cast members. I really don't want to remember everyone's name and role during a silly comedy. Despite that fact, it was a fun ride. Rent.
Vampires Suck - Everyone that was involved in the making of this "movie" should have to give refunds to everyone that spent money on it and then after they go broke, become homeless, and resort to eating cat food, they should die in agony alone in a ditch... possibly on fire. The only time that I laughed (which was twice by the way and yes I was counting) was only when comedian Ken Jeong was on screen. Although the jokes he delivered were horrid, the way that he pulled them off was all his own hilarious style. You'd be better off just watching his stand up acts. Pass like a kidney stone.
Carnival of Souls (1998) - Although very loosely based off the original 1962 film of the same name, this version still manages to hold up its own as a very superb piece of horror. Despite it being twelve years old and having barely any gore, I still found myself cringing and jumping. Wes Craven rarely lets me down. Rent.
Alien from L.A. (via MST3K) - Wow. I cannot believe that anyone could seriously watch this with a straight face. Kathy Ireland sounded like a wounded kitten that needed to be put down, the makeup jobs looked like something a half retarded gorilla from the 80's would do, and the acting was bland and incomprehensible. The only, and I mean ONLY way that you should watch this is with my good friends from Mystery Science Theater 3000. They could make a steaming turd funny. Actually, they just did with this movie. Rent.
Teenage Strangler (via MST3K) - Now, I've seen a lot of bad, and I mean BAAAAAAAD movies (see Vampires Suck) but there are some that just don't have ANY sort of redeeming value at all! Even when Mystery Science Theater 3000 sinks their vicious teeth in this and rip it apart, it still isn't worth the time that you could spend crocheting or learning Dutch. Pass.
Coming soon: The Sorcerer's Apprentice
Also, I'm gonna change the name of this segment to "Quickies for Commoners: Movie reviews for the non movie snob". Still gonna keep the quick few lines format with a mixture of comedy and seriousness, and since no one owns the rights to the "Buy, Rent, or Pass" rating system, I will hang on to that until I think of something better.
Until then, thanks for reading! ^_^
Edit: What do you think of this rating system: "Own, Watch, I'd Rather..."?
The first two are rather self explanatory:
Own - I suggest owning the movie.
Watch - You're good just watching it the one time.
The last one will be unique to me:
I'd Rather... - Something that I'd rather do than watch this movie. Will be different every time. "I'd rather watch a good movie." "I'd rather get a poke in the eye." "I'd rather lose my eyebrows in a grease fire." etc.
What do you think?! ^_^
Monday, July 12, 2010
Quickies with Brad!
Just some very quick reviews of a lot of random movies that I have seen recently.
Buy, Rent, or Pass in no particular order:
Twilight Saga - Eclipse: Pretty damned entertaining if I do say so myself. Although it was long as hell, it totally did not feel as such. Go see it then buy it when it comes out on DVD.
Repo Men: Despite being a Repo - The Genetic Opera rip-off (many MANY similarities) this was quite awesome! VERY gory and brutal as all hell, so of course I LOVED it! Buy, buy, a hundred times BUY!!!
Deadline: A Brittany Murphy flick that I had no idea existed. It made me miss her unique look and acting style so much more than I already do. She did such an awesome job and I wish I had the chance to let her know. :-( Buy.
Daybreakers: A very unique twist on vampire lore. A fun gory good time! Rent.
Darkness: Anna Paquin shows just how boring her acting can be (although I do not believe that is her acting, but just her as she is normally). A HUGE snore-fest. If you value your time, pass. If you have insomnia, doctors will prescribe this to you.
Youth in Revolt: Although I find it hard to believe that any sixteen year olds talk or act like Michael Cera or Portia Doubleday, the movie was enjoyable. Had it's funny moments, but no belly laughs. Rent.
Date Night: Within the first five minutes I was doubled over in teary laughter! Tina Fey and Steve Carell need to breed so we can have generations to come of their comic genius... that is if it is genetically passed. :-\ If not, I'll just settle for them working together on many more films. Buy.
The Losers: I admit, I had not read the comic when I watched this, so I really have no reference or idea of what I missed. As a standalone movie with no knowledge of the comic, it was alright. Bad guys versus good guys, weak and predictable plot, mediocre acting, and no feeling of conclusion. Good film to waste time if you have nothing better to do. Rent.
Kick-Ass: The title says it all! There wasn't one second of this movie that I did not enjoy! I cannot wait for the sequel! Adorable, funny, foul mouthed Hit-Girl (Chloë Moretz) needs her own spin-off! ^_^ BUY!!!
Percy Jackson & the Olympians - The Lightning Thief: So. Much. Awesome. Fun! ^_^ I enjoyed it WAY more than I thought I would/could. Plus, Uma Thurman as Medusa! Need I say more?! Buy!
Hot Tub Time Machine: Stupid funny. Don't worry too much about the temporal physics (like I did), just sit back and laugh. John Cusack rocked it out like always, but Clark Duke and Rob Corddry stole the show. Buy.
Slaughter High: A throwback 80's horror flick from my childhood. Good gravy what an awful movie! I wish I could break the DVD but I think Netflix would frown on that. PAAAAASSSSS!!!!!
Prince of Persia - The Sands of Time: Being a fan of the video game trilogy I was very excited to see how this plays out. Although not EXACTLY like the games, it was still very groovy! I still don't understand why they couldn't get some actual Persians in this film. Eyeliner and fake tan does not a Persian make. Rent.
The Grudge 3: Stop it. Just stop it. No no no no and no. Let it die here, please. Pass.
The Drawn Together Movie The Movie: *sigh* Why must you take one of my favorite crude 'toons and try to make a movie out of it? So effed up it's not even funny. I mean, yes, there are some laughs along the way, but nothing amounting to the quality of the TV series. Just stick with the reruns. Pass.
There's a great segue into this next section; TV shows! Watched the Series premier of Haven on SyFy. Although the acting was atrociously bland as all hell, I was still able to find the charm that will keep me watching. I just hope the acting improves as the series progresses. Also, this season of True Blood has already made up for the majority of the semi-train wreck that was Season 2 (I say semi because I actually kinda liked the storyline). If you have never watched an episode of True Blood... what is WRONG with you?! Hop to it, man! This has got to be the best thing on TV right now! Well, at least until Dexter and Weeds comes back. ^_^
Also, as a nice companion piece to True Blood, Meredith Woerner over at io9.com writes up HILARIOUS and very accurate recaps a couple of days after the latest episode airs. Please go read these and tell her that Brad sent ya! You'll thank me! ^_^
http://io9.com/tag/truebloodrecap
Did you see any of these? What did you think? Let me know by posting a comment! Don't worry, you don't have to have an account here to post a comment and you certainly do not have to agree with me. :-P
Laterz!
Buy, Rent, or Pass in no particular order:
Twilight Saga - Eclipse: Pretty damned entertaining if I do say so myself. Although it was long as hell, it totally did not feel as such. Go see it then buy it when it comes out on DVD.
Repo Men: Despite being a Repo - The Genetic Opera rip-off (many MANY similarities) this was quite awesome! VERY gory and brutal as all hell, so of course I LOVED it! Buy, buy, a hundred times BUY!!!
Deadline: A Brittany Murphy flick that I had no idea existed. It made me miss her unique look and acting style so much more than I already do. She did such an awesome job and I wish I had the chance to let her know. :-( Buy.
Daybreakers: A very unique twist on vampire lore. A fun gory good time! Rent.
Darkness: Anna Paquin shows just how boring her acting can be (although I do not believe that is her acting, but just her as she is normally). A HUGE snore-fest. If you value your time, pass. If you have insomnia, doctors will prescribe this to you.
Youth in Revolt: Although I find it hard to believe that any sixteen year olds talk or act like Michael Cera or Portia Doubleday, the movie was enjoyable. Had it's funny moments, but no belly laughs. Rent.
Date Night: Within the first five minutes I was doubled over in teary laughter! Tina Fey and Steve Carell need to breed so we can have generations to come of their comic genius... that is if it is genetically passed. :-\ If not, I'll just settle for them working together on many more films. Buy.
The Losers: I admit, I had not read the comic when I watched this, so I really have no reference or idea of what I missed. As a standalone movie with no knowledge of the comic, it was alright. Bad guys versus good guys, weak and predictable plot, mediocre acting, and no feeling of conclusion. Good film to waste time if you have nothing better to do. Rent.
Kick-Ass: The title says it all! There wasn't one second of this movie that I did not enjoy! I cannot wait for the sequel! Adorable, funny, foul mouthed Hit-Girl (Chloë Moretz) needs her own spin-off! ^_^ BUY!!!
Percy Jackson & the Olympians - The Lightning Thief: So. Much. Awesome. Fun! ^_^ I enjoyed it WAY more than I thought I would/could. Plus, Uma Thurman as Medusa! Need I say more?! Buy!
Hot Tub Time Machine: Stupid funny. Don't worry too much about the temporal physics (like I did), just sit back and laugh. John Cusack rocked it out like always, but Clark Duke and Rob Corddry stole the show. Buy.
Slaughter High: A throwback 80's horror flick from my childhood. Good gravy what an awful movie! I wish I could break the DVD but I think Netflix would frown on that. PAAAAASSSSS!!!!!
Prince of Persia - The Sands of Time: Being a fan of the video game trilogy I was very excited to see how this plays out. Although not EXACTLY like the games, it was still very groovy! I still don't understand why they couldn't get some actual Persians in this film. Eyeliner and fake tan does not a Persian make. Rent.
The Grudge 3: Stop it. Just stop it. No no no no and no. Let it die here, please. Pass.
The Drawn Together Movie The Movie: *sigh* Why must you take one of my favorite crude 'toons and try to make a movie out of it? So effed up it's not even funny. I mean, yes, there are some laughs along the way, but nothing amounting to the quality of the TV series. Just stick with the reruns. Pass.
There's a great segue into this next section; TV shows! Watched the Series premier of Haven on SyFy. Although the acting was atrociously bland as all hell, I was still able to find the charm that will keep me watching. I just hope the acting improves as the series progresses. Also, this season of True Blood has already made up for the majority of the semi-train wreck that was Season 2 (I say semi because I actually kinda liked the storyline). If you have never watched an episode of True Blood... what is WRONG with you?! Hop to it, man! This has got to be the best thing on TV right now! Well, at least until Dexter and Weeds comes back. ^_^
Also, as a nice companion piece to True Blood, Meredith Woerner over at io9.com writes up HILARIOUS and very accurate recaps a couple of days after the latest episode airs. Please go read these and tell her that Brad sent ya! You'll thank me! ^_^
http://io9.com/tag/truebloodrecap
Did you see any of these? What did you think? Let me know by posting a comment! Don't worry, you don't have to have an account here to post a comment and you certainly do not have to agree with me. :-P
Laterz!
Running in Place Against a Brick Wall
Running in Place Against a Brick Wall 07-12-2010
I dance the dance
you walk the walk
my breathless pants
your breezy talk
my fruitless labor
your effortless grin
my nothing to savor
your quick easy win
my struggle uphill
your vertical ease
my flailing still
your attractive tease
When will you stop?
When will I catch up?
When will you drop?
When will I usurp?
I dance the dance
you walk the walk
my breathless pants
your breezy talk
my fruitless labor
your effortless grin
my nothing to savor
your quick easy win
my struggle uphill
your vertical ease
my flailing still
your attractive tease
When will you stop?
When will I catch up?
When will you drop?
When will I usurp?
Monday, June 21, 2010
Busy Being Alone
Busy Being Alone 06-21-2010
The hurried, the busy, the blustery tizzy
Takes stage on the foreground, abound with the new sound
Yet often ignored, the murk of the lonely, blandly and blurry
Centered and anchored and angered and festered
With thoughts of the ending of acting and bearing
Mundane and abstain and verily insane
Sent mad by the quiets amidst riots of zealots
Yearning and turning, the burning's alluring
To light up the night and stave off the fright
A hope for a dope who can no longer cope
Will sit and ponder and wonder but not wander
The hurried, the busy, the blustery tizzy
Takes stage on the foreground, abound with the new sound
Yet often ignored, the murk of the lonely, blandly and blurry
Centered and anchored and angered and festered
With thoughts of the ending of acting and bearing
Mundane and abstain and verily insane
Sent mad by the quiets amidst riots of zealots
Yearning and turning, the burning's alluring
To light up the night and stave off the fright
A hope for a dope who can no longer cope
Will sit and ponder and wonder but not wander
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Thankful
Thankful 06-17-2010
To people I've known
to new ones I've met
to those still around
to who I have not met yet
You've tinted my life
with colors dispersed
the rainbow of me
thanks you in verse
You brought forth the light
and guided me to see
if it wasn't for you
I don't know who I'd be
The good and the bad
to the bitter-sweet end
I give thanks to you all
to those I can call 'friend'
-------------
I know, not the best, but sometimes I gotta go for the lighter side of writing, the Yang to my Yin, and I felt the need to jot this down for all of you to see how truly grateful I am to have you all in my life, no mater how long or brief it is, will be, or has been. ^_^ Good gravy, when I let my gay side out, I REALLY let it out! LOL! :-P
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Like Sia said...
... Some People Have Real Problems. (side note, look her up, awesome album.)
For real? No, I mean really, for real? *sigh* To protect the innocent, the name has been changed, yadda yadda...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ZaxxonQ: can you do me a favor?
Person2: hmm
Person2: depends
Person2: LOL
ZaxxonQ: can you get a shotgun and shoot me point blank in the face, please?
ZaxxonQ: >_<
ZaxxonQ: sinus pressure, headache, drainage, and a sore throat from all of that. >_<
ZaxxonQ: I can't stop sneezing. I'm fuggin' miserable!
Person2: lol
Person2: nope
ZaxxonQ: >_<
Person2: ugh
Person2: i'm so sick of this
Person2: since april i've been seeing pics these people have been posting on facebook
Person2: endless pool parties
Person2: PERFECT bodies
Person2: am i the only one in dallas that looks fugly?
Person2: LOL
ZaxxonQ: •_•
ZaxxonQ: you know, right now, with what I'm going through, REAL problems, I just wanna slap you. •_•
For real? No, I mean really, for real? *sigh* To protect the innocent, the name has been changed, yadda yadda...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ZaxxonQ: can you do me a favor?
Person2: hmm
Person2: depends
Person2: LOL
ZaxxonQ: can you get a shotgun and shoot me point blank in the face, please?
ZaxxonQ: >_<
ZaxxonQ: sinus pressure, headache, drainage, and a sore throat from all of that. >_<
ZaxxonQ: I can't stop sneezing. I'm fuggin' miserable!
Person2: lol
Person2: nope
ZaxxonQ: >_<
Person2: ugh
Person2: i'm so sick of this
Person2: since april i've been seeing pics these people have been posting on facebook
Person2: endless pool parties
Person2: PERFECT bodies
Person2: am i the only one in dallas that looks fugly?
Person2: LOL
ZaxxonQ: •_•
ZaxxonQ: you know, right now, with what I'm going through, REAL problems, I just wanna slap you. •_•
Monday, June 14, 2010
Another
Another 06-14-2010
Another time
another place
another smile
on another face
The actions hollow
the exquisite bore
the empty yearnings
the want of more
Prospects and promises
with lingering doubt
teasing and taunting
with loathing throughout
With one journey ended
with the same empty yield
with acknowledging glances
with a kiss sealed
The stagnant dance continues
at the same mundane pace
I spy another smile
on yet another face
Another time
another place
another smile
on another face
The actions hollow
the exquisite bore
the empty yearnings
the want of more
Prospects and promises
with lingering doubt
teasing and taunting
with loathing throughout
With one journey ended
with the same empty yield
with acknowledging glances
with a kiss sealed
The stagnant dance continues
at the same mundane pace
I spy another smile
on yet another face
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Sunday, June 6, 2010
